London Wayfarers Hockey Club, Battersea

Great Pumpkin Competition

BONDING

The most common form of bonding with your pumpkin is simply to talk to it. It responds quite well to positive re-enforcement. It also responds negatively to criticism and negative re-enforcement. Don't ever threaten your pumpkin or mention your doubts and disappointments within hearing range of the plant. The mere mention of your disappointment of it's growth rate can cause the growth to completely stop for a period of time. The old saying 'One aw_hit is worth a hundred Attaboys' is very relevant here. Fortunately, pumpkin plants have extremely poor hearing, about ten feet.

A second form of bonding is singing to your plants. This is slightly more effective than talking in an encouraging manner to your crop. It also can backfire as the choice of music is vital. Those who can not sing can turn off the pumpkin, stunting all growth. Sad songs and slow elevator music can also result in reduced production. Slow music can put your pumpkin to sleep.... normally pumpkin fruit grows 24 hours a day. An upbeat, fast tempo is the preferred choice. However, marches are to be avoided as they may cause the pumpkin to grow too quickly and literally burst. Most importantly, do not forget to sing love songs during the pollination period, especially during early morning hours when pollination peaks.

Playing recorded music is sure to produce favorable results, although markedly less effective than the personal touch of your voice. Use the same selection of songs as described for singing.

A few musically inclined growers will bring out their instruments and play to their crops. Again, keep in mind the type of music. There is speculation that symphonic band instruments are more effective than jazz or orchestra. I am currently researching this and will update you shortly(don't hold your breath).

Finally, language plays absolutely no role in pumpkin growth results. My example at the beginning of this article is proof positive that pumpkins are multi-linguistic.

A final form of bonding is to camp out and sleep with your vines as they grow. Anyone who pursues prize winning results will attest that you might as well sleep in the field, because you need to spend most of your time there. My wife(saint that she is) suggested I sleep in the shed next to the plants, as she sees little of me during the growing season anyway.

Last Updated: 11:30 AM Tuesday, 2 October 2007

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